I am the eldest of the three children in my family, and my the younger of my two sisters moved into college this morning. Talking with her this past week as she's been panicked about this very real and very significant change in her life got me thinking back to my freshmen year in college...
... and my roommate.
My roommate was an interesting character. I won't go into all the specific details of why, but he didn't last the full year. And I should add up front here that he and I were actually pretty close. We got along really well, and had a lot of good times. But he did strange things.
He was diagnosed with severe ADD... which meant that it was not uncommon for me to come back to the room to find the door open, the stereo on, the DVD player and TV on with a DVD menu annoyingly looping, all the lights on, the heat on with the window open (in January) and a not on the door from the upperclassmen neighbor asking us to turn everything down. I remember once there were also not one but two open jars of peanut butter out with everything else.
There was also "the closet" incident.
Our closet in Walker hall kinda stuck out into the room, and had these big oak doors on it. I was standing in the room one afternoon and both the doors to the closet were open, one along the wall, and the other was open to that i was looking right at the edge of it, hardly able to see any of it at all. I made the mistake of audibly observing "This room would seem a lot bigger if the closet didn't have doors. It would feel like the closet was part of the room." Then I left to take a walk into town for food or something.
Our room was at the end of the short hall on 1st Walker, and as I came up the stairs from Brooks, I remember seeing my towel at the end of the hall... hanging under my hoodies... still attached to the closet door, which now seemed to live in the hallway.
I walked into the room and my roommate who we'll just call "Chris" couldn't have been prouder. He looked at at me from his desk and beamed with pride. I'm actually relatively sure I saw his tail wag. "Look how big this place now! You were right!"
I was without words. The best part was the RD's response. It was something along the lines of "I don't think there is a written rule about this, but I'm pretty sure you are not allowed the disassemble the building... even if it your room." She said we had to put the doors back on and after close to a week I ended up having to do it. Awesome.
Nothing beats the story of the last weekend he was on campus. It was the weekend before Spring Break, and I hadn't seen him over a week. It was a Thursday night and I had an early class the next morning... something like 10, so I was in bed by 2ish. I fell asleep and after a little while I heard the roomie come in and crawl into bed.
When I woke up again it was to the sound of vomiting... and splashing... in sheets. I was grossed out, but didn't feel like climbing down out of my 7-foot bed loft. That is until I heard his head hit the pillow.
Now I'm NOT the ratting people out type, and even though I didn't consume alcohol before I was 21, i realized that this was college, and it was going to happen, and there was no need to judge. However, I was also aware of several rock legends who had died from drunken asphyxiation (i think that is a delicate enough way to put it) while they slept. I didn't really feel like having a dead roommate.
I climbed down and found that I couldn't wake him without almost vomiting as well, so I went and got the RA on duty who was a friend.
I'll never forget her conversation with him.
Ashley: Chris, get up. This is disgusting. You have to clean this up.
Chris (groggily): Clean what up. I'm fine.
Ashley: Chris you vomited all over your bed and now you're sleeping in it.
Chris: No... no. I don't think so.
Ashely: Then who threw up in your bed?
Chris: Maybe Zach? I dunno.
So he was alright sleeping in my vomit? Whatever. Our RA had come with Ashely and me, and he and I were doing all we could not to bust out laughing in the hallway at 3:30 in the morning.
Here is where it gets gross.
I woke up the next morning, and opened the closet to get my shower caddy out, and to my horror I found his balled up bedding on his side of the closet. Again, I almost ralphed. I immediately talked to the RD. And she said he had to get them out of there... durr.
So about a week later, I was down right below our room where there was this awkward little hallway between Brooks Dining Hall and the Groud floor of Walker Hall. I was at the vending machine down there, and I saw something behind the vending machine. After some careful and distant inspection I realized that this was Chris's bedding... barf filled, and now nicely baked from the heat coming off the back of the cold beverage machine. Epic. Gross. And so many more adjectives.
The strangest thing about all of this is that as i think about my little sister starting her freshmen year, I am exceedingly envious of her. I want so badly to be back at Allegheny, 18, lost, confused, not sure why there is a building called "Oddfellows", homesick, missing all my friends and my dog. I really really wish I was back there. It was such an amazing time. New friends, new town, new way of life, freedom, classes I actually cared about and no one suggesting that I "should really get some sleep."
I miss it, and if I could go back I absolutely would.
So Scooter, if you are reading this, know that your no roommate cannot possibly be more of a trip than mine. (And your roommate sounds cool anyway). And also know you are starting four years of incredible growth and fun. Enjoy it. Don't be nervous. A few years from now I'm betting you'll look back on this week and feel the same fond nostalgia I do.
kbyeloveyou.
